Another night for the books. I joined two of my European friends for a night on the town in Washington, D.C. Wait, I need to back up a bit…
I have an unhealthy addiction to Jameson. Courtesy of Jameson, I have been chasing leprechauns around random cities all over the globe since I turned 12. If you ever see me at a party, there’s a good chance that my friend Jameson will make an appearance. And this night was no different. After emptying a couple of bottles, we made our way out to to the bars. The night was going without incident until we attempted to make our way back to my friends place. We exited the metro at Union Station and went in search of a bathroom. If you’ve ever been to Union Station, you know that the inside is pretty much a mall.
My friends got tired of looking for the bathroom at some point, so they decided to go all over the doors of a storefront. Finding it hilarious, I got my camera out and started taking pictures. As I was taking pictures of some of the architecture, I heard my friends running off. I turned around to find the Metro police. Shit.
The guy put me in handcuffs and claimed that he had me on security footage. He told me I would have to wait while he called the DC police.
When the DC police arrived, we went to the security booth to review the tape. I was trying not to laugh with every fiber of my body as I watch my friends laughing and smiling as they pissed all over the place. When they saw that I was not in the video, they had no choice but to let me go. Still drunk, I thought it would be funny to ask for a copy of the video. I was then escorted out of the metro station. Oh well.
Once outside, I got on my phone and tried to locate my friends. No answer. Again. No answer. I gave up after a while and decided to catch a nap on a bench next to a hobo.
About an hour later I get a call from one of my friends. Whispers. “Is ANYONE following you? Do they have our numbers?” I’m sobering up and losing patience quick. What the fuck guys — give me the address so I can sleep.
I get the address and put it into my phone’s GPS. Unfortunately, the GPS system is set up for driving and not walking. I walked in circles for about an hour before I got to the address they gave me — an abandoned building that is clearly not my friend’s place. What the fuck guys. I call them up and hear more whispers. “Are you at the address?” Yes. “Walk to the corner and stop.”
They come running around like they’re under heavy fire. Apparently they were worried that the cops were following me home. On the way home, I was bombared with questions like, “Am I going to be able to use Union Station anymore?”, “Is my picture going to be posted all over the metro stations?”, etc. Yeh guys, you’ll be on the ‘most-wanted’ list tomorrow. Let’s work on your disguise tonight…
NOT.
(1 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)
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